


Just A Rather Very Intelligent System

by DarkestSight (Daylight)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Action, Angst, BAMF JARVIS, Gen, Humor, Hurt Tony, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Jarvis, Team as Family, Tony Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-05-26
Packaged: 2018-03-26 00:03:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3829795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daylight/pseuds/DarkestSight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five times Jarvis took control of the Iron Man armour without the other Avengers finding out and one time they did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Many of my half-finished fics and plot bunnies are most likely soon to be Jossed, but I felt that this one really needed to get out before the new movie because of certain things that may happen in Age of Ultron. So I've been working hard to finish it and it's almost done. Hopefully, it will be done in time. The plan is to post at least one chapter per day leading up to May 1st. Fingers crossed.

There are times when having a hammer-wielding Norse god on your side is not necessarily an advantage, such as when fighting in the tight confines of an AIM underground base.

Tony winced as the clang of metal against stone echoed loudly down the dark, concrete tunnel. The reverberations shook the ground beneath his feet and caused cracks to appear across the ceiling.

“Readings indicate the structural integrity of the base has been reduced to 79 percent,” said Jarvis' voice in his ear. 

“You want to tone it down a bit, Hammer Time,” Tony called out.

Thor glanced back, a wide grin on his face, hammer spinning in his hand. “Would you rather I let the soldiers get away?” He let the hammer go and it shot down the tunnel knocking down half a dozen of AIM's soldiers-for-hire on its way.

Letting the soldiers get away was the last thing Tony wanted. He'd been pissed as hell to learn that AIM hadn't burnt to ash with Aldrich Killian. After much digging, he'd found numerous factions and installations across the globe including this one in Peru. Now, it seemed they were plotting something big, and Tony had no intention of leaving until he found what the hell that was.

Another wave of soldiers came at them firing laser rifles. Tony did his best to avoid the blasts. So far their weapons didn't seem to do much more than singe the paint off his armour and cause minor electrical surges but he didn't want to take the chance of them hitting something vital. Grabbing the end of one of the rifles, he slammed its owner against the wall, and then swung the rifle around to knock over two of his pals. They seemed capable of taking quite a pounding and he made a mental note to check out their body armour if he got the chance.

Thunder sounded as Thor pounded his hammer against the floor knocking over more of the soldiers as he caused the tunnel to shake once more.

“Structural integrity at 72 percent,” Jarvis informed him.

Tony, who'd only escaped being knocked over too thanks to a quick fire of his repulsors, winced a second time and wondered why he'd let himself be teamed with the Asgardian. It had been Steve's idea of course. Tony and Thor were supposed to be the distraction, making as much noise and fuss as they could while Widow, Hawkeye, and the Captain snuck in the back way and did the real work ie. downloaded all of AIM's files before they had a chance to delete them. 

Bruce had been left to wait in the Quinjet as they'd thought the Hulk's method of fighting wouldn't be quite so conducive in this sort of environment. Truthfully though, Thor wasn't much better.

“Could you at least stick to hitting the people and not the building?” Tony said with exasperation. “I really don't feel like becoming an iron pancake.”

“Of course, if that would make you more comfortable,” Thor replied amicably, stowing his hammer for a moment and instead using his elbow to knock a nearby guard unconscious. “Perhaps if I had a bit more help...”

“Are you suggesting I'm not pulling my weight?” Tony said in astonishment. He dodged a laser blast and fired a repulsor back down the tunnel where several more guards were trying to sneak up on them. 

Thor shrugged but said nothing, the grin still wide on his face.

Tony scowled beneath his helmet. “Fine. I'll give you a little help, you giant puffed up Fabio wannabe,” he grumbled.

Firing up the repulsors in his boots, he flew down the tunnel taking out everyone and everything in his way. The tunnel ended in a set of metal doors which he plowed right through entering a large room where several more guards were gathered, their rifles already aimed in his direction.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” he declared as he made his customary three point landing in the middle of the room, “but there was this pretentious Norse god in my way.”

Palms out, arms outstretched, he spun around firing his repulsors in a circle clearing the room in a matter of seconds. The bodies made dull thuds as they hit the floor. Straightening up, he brushed some imaginary dust off his hands.

“Not carrying my weight, my ass,” he said.

“Not bad,” Thor said as he caught up.

Tony flipped open the mask of his helmet and glared at him. “Not bad? Seriously? What do you...”

“Forgive me, Anthony,” Thor interrupted though it was clear he hadn't actually been listening. His gaze was intent on their surroundings. “But something about this seems amiss.”

Stowing his annoyance, Tony looked around. He'd only glanced at it before not really taking it in, but now that he did he realized he was in some sort of workshop, a bit like one of his, except his were more advanced and a lot cooler. There were several workbenches with tools, various bits of machinery, a large computer monitor connected to numerous servers, and a second set of doors presumably leading further into the base. A fairly typical mechanical laboratory. It took a couple seconds for Tony to realize what Thor was talking about. The workshop itself wasn't wrong. It's exactly the sort of thing he'd expect to find in an AIM base. The problem was where the workshop was located, in other words exactly where it wasn't supposed to be.

Tony frowned. “I thought all the R&D stuff was at the other end of the base. Did we take a wrong turn somewhere?”

“I do not believe so,” Thor replied.

“Crap.” 

Just like that their whole plan was out the window. He and Thor were supposed to be in the operation centre of the base, creating destruction and mayhem, while Cap and the spy twins broke into the labs and gathered info. But if they were here... 

He switched on the link to the rest of the team. “Um, Cap. You know that intel we got on the base's layout...”

“It's bogus,” Steve replied sounding rather out of breath. “Yeah, we figured that out.”

The sound of laser fire came over the comlink. 

“Having a bit of trouble?” Tony asked.

It was Natasha who answered. “So far we've encountered a lot of hostiles and no labs or databanks,” she said, her voice punctuated by several thuds and grunts.

“It's almost like they don't want us stealing all their secrets,” put in Clint. The distinct twang of his bow could be heard in the background.

“Please tell me you've got something,” said Steve.

“You're in luck, Cap,” Tony said gazing at the servers that took over almost an entire wall of the room. “We have got something. I don't know what sort of something but it's definitely something.”

“Check it out,” the Captain replied, “but be careful. This may be a trap.”

“It usually is,” Tony said before turning off the comlink once more.

He headed straight for the monitor taking off his gauntlets and tossing them on a nearby workbench.

“I shall guard the door,” said Thor taking up position by the entrance.

Tony gave him an absent wave in acknowledgement already busy tapping the screen as he began shifting through data. AIM had definitely been up to something big here. It would take him a while to decrypt all the data but from what he could access, there seemed to be a whole lot of specialized machinery being shipped into the base. Knowing Jarvis could get the needed info faster than he could, he stuck one of his own personally designed receivers onto the servers allowing the A.I. to connect to the system.

“Get me everything they've got, Jarvis.”

“Yes, sir.”

More data flowed over the computer screen. 

“There's something about the stuff they had shipped here,” he muttered, half to Jarivs, half to himself. “Something familiar.” The components floated through his brain arranging and rearranging themselves in different configurations.

“In what way?” Thor asked from the doorway startling Tony who'd almost forgotten he was there. “What are they attempting to build?”

“I'm not sure, but whatever it is it certainly isn't a sewing machine.”

“Sir, there seems to be a problem,” Jarvis interrupted.

Tony sighed. “Don't say that, J. You know I hate it when you say that.”

“The computer appears to have detected my hack and is activating some sort of defence mechanism. I believe it is going to...”

Blue arcs of electricity suddenly shot over the servers making Tony jump back as things sparked and smoked. In an instant, the monitor was dead and the entire server bank fried.

“Crap,” Tony exclaimed. “Please tell me you got something before it blew.”

“I'm afraid all I was able to retrieve was the low level information you already examined,” Jarvis replied, a trace of regret in his tone.

“Now what?” said Thor.

“Now...” Tony began gazing about

Suddenly he wished he hadn't been so eager to take down everyone in the room. He could have used one of them to tell him what the hell was going on. Surprisingly, there seemed to be no scientists among them. They must have been evacuated the moment Tony and Thor made their dramatic entrance. They'd probably be continuing their work at a new base within the week. 

His eyes lit upon the unopened doors at the other end of the room. The doors were large and looked like they'd been reinforced. Tony was willing to bet half his fortune that whatever AIM was working on was on the other side.

“Now we see what's behind door number two,” he said taking a step towards them.

A tremor shook the room.

Closing his eyes, Tony sighed and shook his head. “What did I say about the hammer?” he said in exasperation.

“That wasn't me,” said Thor looking around in confusion.

“Structural integrity down to 57 percent,” Jarvis announced. 

The room shook again.

“49 percent.”

“What the hell?” Tony exclaimed.

“Thor, Iron Man,” came Steve's voice over the coms. “Looks like AIM's about to cut their losses and bury this place along with everything and everyone in it. Get what you can and get out.”

“Understood,” Thor replied.

Tony scowled. “Damn it. All that fucking work and nothing to show for it.”

“Maybe it was a trap,” Thor suggested. “The information we found might have been a ruse to get us here.”

“Or maybe,” Tony said eyeing the door again, “they're trying to bury this place because they know we're close to finding out what they're up to.”

This time the shaking almost knocked the two of them off their feet. Dust rained down from the ceiling and tools toppled off the workbenches onto the floor.

“Structural integrity at 35 percent. Sir, I do believe it would be prudent at this juncture to make a prompt exit.”

“Not yet,” Tony replied. “I want to see where this door leads.”

“That information will be of little use to you if you become trapped with it,” the A.I. continued.

More shaking occurred accompanied by several thunderous booms. 

“Structural integrity at...”

“Will you quit that?” Tony snapped. “I'm not leaving here until I find out what AIM's up to and that's final. I'm not letting these wannabe techno-anarchists get away with...”

“Killing you, sir?”

Sometimes Tony wished he hadn't programmed Jarvis with quite so much sarcastic wit. Not that he actually recalled programming Jarvis to be sarcastic. The damn AI must have picked it up from somewhere.

Thor lifted his shoulder in an elegant shrug. “These are your enemies not mine. The choice is yours.”

“Well, then...” Tony knew exactly what to do. He had no intention of letting AIM get away with whatever the hell they were trying to get away with. The ghost of Aldrich Killian had haunted him enough. 

He reached for the door handle.

Or at least, he tried to reach for the door handle. His muscles contracted as he attempted to move his arm, but instead of moving, his arm was jarred painfully as the armour refused to move with him. 

He stared down at the uncooperative limb hanging by his side. “Uh, Jarvis...” he began but before he could say more the repulsors fired beneath his feet. 

“Hey!” he cried as he found himself turning around and flying out of the room and back down the hallway through which they'd come. He tried speaking again but only got as far as “Wha...” before a large boom sounded from behind him. 

A shock wave blew through the corridor pushing him forward and bringing with it a giant cloud of dust.

Suddenly, Tony no longer cared that he'd lost control of the armour. All he wanted was to get out of there. Fortunately, that seemed to be exactly where the armour was taking him. 

He flew, or rather was flown, through the underground base back through the maze of corridors they'd fought in only minutes before. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Thor flying along beside him hammer outstretched as they tried to out race the inevitable collapse. Debris was falling everywhere as the base came apart around them. Heart pounding, Tony had to resist the urge to close his eyes as the armour wove between the falling objects. The base's power soon went taking the lights with it leaving only the light from of Tony's armour to guide them. 

The moment of chaos and darkness seemed to last forever. 

And then finally they were out shooting up into brightness and blue sky.

They came down in an empty field a hundred feet or so from the base. Tony's control over the armour returned when he landed and he fell forward on his hands and knees.

“Are you alright, my friend?” Thor asked placing a hand on his shoulder.

Tony nodded for once unable to speak as he breathed in deep lungfuls of air waiting for his heartbeat to slow down to a more normal rhythm.

“Stark! Thor!” came the concerned cry of Steve over their coms.

“We are safe,” Thor reassured him. “Though I'm afraid we were unable to accomplish our mission.”

“Never mind,” the Captain said with an audible sigh. “The whole thing was probably a trap to begin with. Meet us back at the Quinjet.”

“We will be there,” Thor replied. 

The Asgardian held out a hand and Tony accepted it glad to find his legs didn't wobble too much as he was pulled to his feet.

“That was a wise decision you made,” Thor told him. “If we had remained a moment longer, we would have surely been buried. You have good instincts.”

“Huh? Um, yeah. Right,” Tony said distractedly. He was gazing back in the direction of the base where a dark cloud of smoke and dust hung in the air.

Thor slapped him on the back making Tony very grateful to still be wearing armour and therefore not sent back down to his knees. “Come,” Thor said. “Let us reunite with our brothers and sister in arms.” He swung his hammer and was soon flying off in the direction of the Quinjet.

Tony stayed a moment longer still staring at the smoke.

“Jarvis...” he began.

“My apologies, sir,” Jarvis said though the A.I.'s tone was not especially apologetic. “I sensed the collapse was imminent and my priority protocols engaged. It was necessary to remove you from the building immediately to ensure your safety.”

“Just...” Tony said taking a shaky breath. “Just never do that again.”

A distant boom could be heard as more of the base gave way.

“And Jarvis,” he added.

“Yes, sir?”

“Thanks.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter though actually this is the length I thought all the chapters would be but the others insisted on being longer. This was also originally supposed to be chapter 3 but the original chapter 2 needs more work.

In many ways Tony Stark is just an ordinary man. People tend to forget that because there are so many ways in which Tony is anything but ordinary: his genius intellect, his rich extravagant lifestyle, his over-the-top arrogant attitude, his part-time superhero gig. But for all that, physically he is just an average human being. His reflexes are that of an ordinary man. They were not enhanced by super-soldier serum or gamma rays. They were not perfected over a childhood in the circus or in a covert espionage training facility, and as much as he would like to pretend to be, he is not a god. He is a human being, prone to human weaknesses and human failings, and when a human being tries to keep up with gods, monsters, and super-soldiers, the possibility of mistakes always lingers.

On one particularly tiring Tuesday, the Avengers spent over an hour saving the city of Detroit from an invasion of what Tony had colourfully described as slimy bat people. The winged creatures, or more precisely what remained of them, were now splattered across most of a city block. For some reason, their bodies began to disintegrate upon death becoming a dark purplish goo. It covered the road. It stained the buildings. It dripped off the lampposts. The goo was everywhere.

Standing in the middle of the goo covered street, Tony poked a particularly large pile with an armoured toe and grimaced when it wobbled in a rather disturbing way. 

“You wouldn’t believe how glad I am not to be the one who has to clean up this mess,” he said.

“Not willing to get your hands dirty?” said Clint as he walked up beside him.

Tony popped open his faceplate and gave him a look that said exactly what he thought of that comment. “Not willing to get slimed.” He gazed down at the patches of goo splattered across his armour. “At least not anymore than I already have been.”

Barton smirked at him. He appeared surprisingly goo free. There were obvious advantages to killing things from a distance. “I thought you were a philanthropist, Stark. What about helping out the poor people of Detroit?”

“I will gladly give them anything they need to get rid of this mess. I’ll hire a hundred professional cleaners. I’ll create a giant, industrial strength, super-powered scrubber, but I am not touching any more goo.” Gazing around, Tony added, “Where have our equally slimed comrades-in-arms got to?”

Barton pointed a thumb back down the street. “Thor and Cap are busy Hulk wrangling. I don’t think the big guy likes this stuff anymore than you do. Last I saw, he’d broken a fire hydrant and was taking an impromptu shower.” 

Tony snorted. “Can’t say I blame him. I feel like taking a bath for a week and the stuff’s not even on my skin.” He yawned and stretched as best he could inside the armour. “Then I think I’ll take a little siesta. What about our femme fatale?”

“Nat’s double checking to make sure they’re all dead. Caught one playing possum. Last thing we need is to have one rise from the dead when the emergency crews are…”

Clint suddenly stopped. There was a noise behind them. They both heard it. It was only a small sound, the scruff of something against pavement, but with the adrenaline still running through their systems and their senses still hyperaware from the battle, the noise was like an explosion.

They swung around, Clint pulling an arrow from his quiver and setting it to his bow, Tony slamming down his faceplate and raising his arm ready to fire. Tony was tired from the long fight but he wasn’t about to let that slow him down. The moment he saw the dark shape moving across the street, he aimed and triggered the firing mechanism on the repulsor in his palm. Only then did his brain register exactly what he was aiming at.

The dark shape across the street wasn’t another slimy bat person. 

The dark shape was in fact a skinny, dark skinned, preteen boy, his eyes widening in fear.

A millisecond became an eternity as Tony realized what was about to happen. He felt frozen. He knew he didn’t have time to stop the firing mechanism from activating. He tried to change his aim but it felt as if the armour had tripled in weight and his arm could only move in ridiculously slow motion. The repulsor blast would go right through the purple T-shirt the boy wore, burn through his skin, and blacken his bones. Tony could already see it in his mind. As he heard the whine of the repulsor powering up, he knew the boy was going to die. He was going to die at Tony’s hand and all Tony would be able to do was watch.

He was so certain as to what was about to happen next that it took him several seconds for him to notice that it hadn’t. He blinked in confusion.

The kid was still alive. He looked like he was about to piss his pants but he was still alive.

The whine of the repulsor had reversed decreasing in volume and Jarvis’ voice sounded in his ear.

“Repulsor powering down.”

Tony just stood there, arm still outstretched, unable to move as his heart thudded painfully in his chest. 

God, he had almost...

“Damn, kid,” Barton cried. “Get out of here before you get yourself killed!”

The terrified boy took off, sneakers scrapping against the pavement.

Slowly, Tony let his arm fall back down.

“He must have snuck past the police perimeter,” Clint said placing the unused arrow back in his quiver and slinging his bow across his back. “I swear these idiotic souvenir hunters are getting worse all the time.”

Tony was still staring at where the boy had stood, his heart pounding. He was suddenly very grateful to be wearing his armour as his legs were so shaky he was sure to have collapsed without it. His whole body was covered in a cold clammy sweat.

“You okay?” asked Barton frowning at him.

“Huh?” Tony turned towards him. The mask of the armour was also something to be grateful for as he was sure he wouldn't be able to call up one of his own at that moment. “Yeah. I'm fine, fine. I just want to get the fuck out of here.”

Clint nodded. “Nice reflexes,” he said before turning and heading off down the street.

“Uh, thanks,” Tony replied.

Closing his eyes for a moment, he took a deep breath.

“Nice reflexes, J,” he said quietly.

“Thank you, sir,” said the A.I.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not completely satisfied with this one but here it is. Should have another chapter up later today.

God, he was tired. Tony raised a hand to rub his eyes only remembering just in time that he was still wearing his armour. He lowered the hand back down and instead shifted the helmet tucked under his arm. Sometimes wearing metal gloves could be a real pain in the ass.

“Sir?” inquired a voice in his ear. 

“What is it, Jarvis?” Tony replied wearily.

“I believe the others are waiting for you.”

Tony turned to look at the Quinjet where the other Avengers had gathered. Clint, red burn marks decorating his right arm and the right side of his face, was leaning against the side of the plane idly doing something to his bow. Thor, armour, cape, and hair still majestic even after the tiring battle, stood a few feet away swinging his hammer back and forth as he surveyed their surroundings. Natasha and Bruce had disappeared somewhere inside the jet, probably getting it ready to leave, but Steve was waiting at the top of the ramp, arms crossed over his soot-stained uniform as he glared down at Tony. 

“Perhaps it would be best if you joined them,” Jarvis suggested.

“Yeah,” said Tony stretching the word out in long drawl. “I don't think that's such a great idea right now.”

Tony had fucked up. He knew he had fucked up. He didn't need the look Steve was sending him to figure that out and he certainly didn't need the inevitable lecture that was soon to follow.

“Let's go, Stark,” Steve called out. “Unless you're enjoying the view.”

The view? The Captain's comment brought Tony's attention unwillingly back to his surroundings. A large spotlight perched on top a nearby firetruck illuminated the night showing off the results of the recent battle. What had once been a vibrant city street was now a scene of devastation. It looked like a bomb had gone off, several bombs. Buildings were in pieces. Fissures split the pavement. Here and there flames flickered. And then there were the people. The sound of sirens and the blades of helicopters could be heard as medical personnel arrived to take care of the many wounded. 

Tony's heavy heart sank even deeper in his chest.

When he fucked things up, he really fucked them up.

“Come on, Stark,” Steve called again. “Some of us would really like to get out of here.” He was giving Tony that look once more full of smug righteousness and judgement.

Tony knew he'd fucked up. He also knew what was going to happen next. He'd get on the plane. He'd sit across from Steve and they would glare at each other some more; then Steve would demand to know what was wrong with him. Tony would make some sarcastic reply. Steve would start pointing out all of Tony's mistakes, and soon the whole thing would devolve into a giant argument. Thor would try to play peacemaker, Clint and Natasha would hide in the cockpit, and poor Bruce would curl up in a corner and pretend to sleep. 

Tony really didn't have the energy to go through that again.

“Actually,” he said to Steve, “I think I'll find my own way home. You know, stretch the old repulsors.”

From his earpiece, Jarvis spoke up, “Sir, given the circumstances, flying the armour back would not...”

“Quiet, J,” Tony shushed him.

Steve frowned. He opened his mouth as if to say something but Bruce came up behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder. Some whispers passed between the two of them; then Bruce came down the ramp and joined Tony.

“You alright?” he asked. His post-hulk-out blanket was wrapped around his shoulders and he looked almost as tired as Tony felt.

“Me?” said Tony. “I'm awesome, fantastic, peachy-keen.”

“Huh,” said Bruce incredulously. “Because you know you look like crap.”

Tony waved his hand vaguely at their surroundings. “It's the lighting. It doesn't really bring out my best features.”

“Yeah. I suppose those emergency spotlights always give people that pale, red-eyed, just back from the dead look.”

“Exactly,” Tony replied having no intention of giving up the game even when he knew Bruce was just playing along. “I'd be my usual ruggedly handsome self in daylight.”

Bruce's lips twisted in a halfhearted smirk. “No comment.” He turned his gaze to the destruction around them. “I don't remember much but I take it things didn't go so well.”

“You think?” Tony said bitterly, the care-free facade falling away. The weariness was making itself felt all the way down to his bones. 

Bruce sighed like a man who had had to put up with Tony Stark one too many times. “Tony, you know you did...”

Tony held up a hand. “Don't you dare go all pep talk on me. I performed like a drugged up monkey out there. My flying sucked. My reaction time sucked. And my aim? I think I hit more buildings than drones...”

“From what I remember those drones were pretty damn fast.”

“I should have been faster!” Tony snapped, his sudden cry startling even himself. 

He closed his eyes taking a few seconds just to breath trying to pull the frayed pieces of himself back together. When he opened them once more, he found Bruce gazing searchingly at him, his brow furrowed.

“When was last time you got some sleep?” 

The sudden change of topic momentarily stumped Tony.

Sleep? Tony's fingers twitched as he felt the urge to rub his sore eyes once again. Sleep hadn't exactly been occurring recently. Mostly it had just been occasional restless dozing full of rampaging nightmares. It would have been better if Pepper were around, he always slept better with her beside him, but she'd been at a conference in Germany for the past week.

“Approximately forty-seven hours ago,” Jarvis supplied helpfully using the armour's speakers so Bruce could hear him too. “Though that was only for one and a half hours. Your last full night of sleep was...”

“Jarvis,” Tony interrupted with a sigh. “What have I told you about sharing personal information?” 

“I was merely following your request to provide all necessary information which could aid in the operation of the Avengers, sir. Shall I also inform him of your current eating habits?”

If Tony could have, he would have slapped a hand across his face. He cursed the metal gloves once more along with smartass A.I.s.

“Tony...” Bruce was giving him that worried look, the one Pepper often gave him. The one that seemed to convey both fear for his well-being and his sanity.

“Forty-seven hours is nothing,” Tony insisted defensively. “I've gone without sleep for way longer than that. I'm fine. I'm fine.”

Bruce raised his eyebrows. “Peachy-keen?”

“Peachy-keen,” Tony repeated and nodded his head. Glancing back at the Quinjet, he added, “Shouldn't you be getting back? I think our glorious fearless leader is getting impatient.” 

“I was waiting for you,” said Bruce. 

“Uh uh,” said Tony shaking his head this time. “I'm making my own way home, remember? Have flying armoured suit will travel?”

Bruce gave him a level look. “We're in Kuala Lumpur, Tony. Your suit is fast but it's still going to take you a few hours to get back to New York and you're exhausted. Do you even have enough power left after the fight?”

Tony waved a hand as if the mere idea of him being low on power were a ludicrous impossibility. “Oh, I've got plenty of juice left in the old suit. Right, Jarvis?”

“There is enough power to make it back to the tower,” Jarvis replied. “However I would not recommend...”

“See. Plenty of power.”

Bruce looked unconvinced. “I don't think going off on your own is a good idea right now.”

Tony snorted. “And having Captain Perfect Pants and me in a small confined space is? No, thanks.”

“He's worried about you,” said Bruce. “We're all worried about you.”

“Worried that I'll fuck things up again,” Tony muttered gazing at the ground.

“Worried you'll get yourself killed.”

Tony's head snapped up. He opened his mouth to make another smartass comment and failed.

“So you were off your game today,” Bruce said some of the temper he always kept carefully controlled starting to bleed through into his voice. “So what? You're human. It happens. The important thing is why it happened. You've been out of it for a while now. Just tell us what's going on. We want to help.”

The pleading look on Bruce's face was too much for Tony. Suddenly, it was all too much for Tony. Bruce's pleading look. Steve's patriotic glare. The devastation surrounding him. It felt like he had been dragged naked over a desert road, crushed in a trash compactor, and made to listen to Justin Bieber songs at high volume for twenty-four hours straight. Both his brain and body had had enough.

He let out a deep breath. “Can we just not do this now?” he said, his voice slow and rough.

“Tony, we need to talk about this,” Bruce insisted.

“Yeah, yeah,” Tony muttered. He took the helmet from under his arm and placed it back on his head. The familiar digital displays that sprang up before him were comforting as was having a mask on that he didn't have to work for, a convenient barrier between him and everyone else. “I'll see you back home.”

“Tony, wait...” Bruce began but it was too late. His voice was drowned out by the sound of repulsors firing.

Tony shot up into the sky. The buildings streaked below him as he left his teammates and the debris strewn battlefield behind.

“Sir,” said Jarvis. “Captain Rogers is attempting to contact you.”

“Forget it, Jarvis,” Tony replied. “Turn the radio off.”

“But sir...”

“Turn it off!”

He was escaping, or if he was being truthful with himself which he seldom was, he was running away or rather flying away. Flying had never been an ambition of Tony's. It hadn't even been the main purpose of creating the armour, but sometimes it felt like the best thing to come out of it. Buildings became fields became water, and soon all there was was just the background hum of the armour, the lights of the stars above him, and the ocean below him. 

Eventually, the tension in his body started to fade and his lungs took in deep calm breaths as he finally relaxed. He thought of asking Jarvis to play some tunes or even bring up some work he could look at to break the monotony of the flight, but he found it hard to call up the effort through the warm haze that was starting to envelope his brain.

The ocean streamed by below him. 

The constellations passed by over head. 

His eyelids began to droop.

An alarm blared and his eyes snapped open again. “What...?” he mumbled.

“Sir,” said Jarvis. “You are deviating from the proposed flight route.”

Almost reluctantly, Tony's eyes focused on the display in front of him and saw he was veering too far south. 

“Oh, right.”

He switched direction. He flew on the right course for a while but it wasn't long before his wandering mind began to doze off again.

An alarm sounded a second time dragging Tony back into the real world.

“Sir, the heading has deviated once more,” said Jarvis.

“Ok, ok,” Tony said sleepily. “I've got it.”

He'd been heading too far north this time but he was able to correct it again. A few wispy clouds passed by as he continued on course. The arc-reactor powering the armour hummed soothingly. Soon, his eyelids grew heavy once more, his breathing became shallower, and he drifted off into darkness.

This time a much louder alarm woke him.

“Sir, altitude has gone below 1000 feet,” said Jarvis, a surprising amount of anxiety in his normally passive voice.

Tony opened his eyes to see nothing but ocean in front of him, miles of empty ocean, and it looked like he was headed in a shallow dive right towards it. 

He panicked. His limbs, which normally Jarvis helped keep locked in position on long distance flights, flailed about madly and he tumbled about in the air buffeted by the wind. He became a plummeting windmill of spinning metal and intermittently firing repulsors until he was, eventually, able to get back in control. 

For a moment, he just hovered there in mid-air breathing heavily.

“Sir, perhaps I should take full control until we reach our destination,” said Jarvis.

“Full control?” Tony replied uncertainly, still gasping for air.

“Unless you'd rather go for a late night swim?”

Tony gazed down at the large expanse of dark ocean below him. 

“I've been a fucking idiot again, haven't I?” he said.

“I couldn't possibly comment, sir,” replied the A.I.

Tony let out a long sigh. “Take me home, J.”

He felt the armour shift around him, legs straightening, arms pinned to his sides, and then he was horizontal and soaring through the sky once more. Despite not being in control, he felt strangely safe cocooned in the armour. The world sped by and soon a feeling of peace returned. With it came sleep, real sleep that he hadn't had in a long, long time.

Sometime later a voice penetrated the fog that had surrounded him.

“Sir?” said Jarvis.

“Hmm?” Tony said not bothering to open his eyes.

“We have arrived at the tower.”

“Ok, J,” Tony replied, his voice not much more than a mumbled sigh. He had no wish to leave the peaceful darkness he'd finally found.

“Shall I give you back control of the armour?”

Tony's eyes reluctantly blinked open. He was, in fact, in the tower. He was standing in the middle of the large living room that occupied most of the common floor. Across the room, he spotted a couch amongst a collection of loveseats and armchairs that surrounded a large glass coffee table. 

The couch looked extremely comfortable and soft and inviting.

“Couch,” he said sleepily.

Thankfully despite the vagueness of the instruction, Jarvis understood precisely what he meant and the armour walked in the direction of the couch taking Tony with it.

“Out, J,” he muttered once he'd reached his destination.

The armour opened up. Tony stumbled a step and then pretty much collapsed onto the waiting couch. The soft surface was blissful to sink into and in a fraction of a second he was back in the world of sleep he'd barely stepped out of.

He half-woke again an indeterminable time later when he felt a blanket fall across his shoulders.

“How the hell did he make it back?” asked a voice.

“No clue,” another replied. “I was expecting to hear he'd gone down in the middle of the Pacific.” 

There was a loud sigh. “One of these days were going to have to strap him down and have a real talk with him.”

“Later. Let him rest. He needs it.”

When the voices had stopped and the sound of footsteps had faded into the distance, Tony risked a quiet, “J?”

The voice of the A.I. came through his earpiece. “You are on the couch in the living room, sir. The tower is secure. The other Avengers have returned and are all unharmed and accounted for.”

“'S good, good,” Tony mumbled as he started to drift off once more. “G'night, J.”

“Goodnight, sir,” Jarvis replied. “Sweet dreams.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's my favourite and was finished long before any of the others so I hope you enjoy it.

“I don't believe this.” 

Tony swung an armoured fist into a nearby robot knocking it across the street and into a mailbox. It lay there twitching. 

“I mean seriously who made these? They're pathetic.”

He fired his repulsors at another robot. It toppled over backwards onto the pavement where it burst into flames.

“I could make better robots in my sleep. In fact, I'm pretty sure I already have.”

“Well, that would explain Dum-E,” came Clint's voice over the radio.

The archer was perched on top of one of the nearby buildings keeping an eye on the street below. Every so often an arrow would shoot down and another robot would explode.

“Very funny,” Tony replied. He grabbed one of the robots by its arm and the arm came off in his hand. “Pathetic,” he said again shaking his head. “It's like whoever made these went bananas at a scrap yard or something.”

The robots, which despite being as pathetic as Tony described were annoyingly large in number, did resemble the assembled remains of a scrap heap. They were cobbled together from such things as bits of copper pipe, rusted car doors, 80s style computers, hair dryers, old lamps, mattress springs, and broken toasters. Each was different. The only thing they had in common were glowing yellow eyes and an insistent need to destroy everything in sight. 

“Don't get too cocky, Stark,” said Steve through the coms. “These robots might look pathetic but they can still pack a wallop.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Tony grumbled.

A boom of thunder sounded down the block where Thor along with Steve was keeping the other end of the robot army at bay. Natasha was where her strengths were more useful trying to track down whoever had created these robots and Bruce was with her. It had been decided that considering the Hulk could cause as much, if not more, property damage than the robots they'd only bring him in if necessary. So far it hadn't been.

With the civilians all evacuated and the robots falling so easily under his repulsors, it's possible Tony did grow a bit cocky. It's also possible that he was a bit distracted because despite his insistence of the robots' inferior construction, something in him still itched to figure out how they worked.

As it was, he never saw what slammed into his back.

The force almost knocked him over but he put his hands out in front of him and fired up his repulsors to catch himself. He took the opportunity to launch into the air spinning around to confront his attacker. It was just another robot though something seemed different about this one. Tony couldn't quite put his finger on what it was but he didn't like the way its glowing eyes looked at him.

“Not nice,” he said and fired both repulsors at it.

It took a bit longer than usual to destroy this one but Tony had soon reduced it to the scrap it had been made from just like the rest.

“Sir.” Jarvis's voice echoed through his helmet. “We may have a situation.”

“Other than the invasion of the T-800s?”

Landing back on the street, Tony grabbed a robot that was trying to sneak past him and used it to destroy two more.

“There appears to be something adhered to the back of the armour,” Jarvis explained using a slightly alarmed tone Tony was sure he'd never programmed him with.

“What?”

Tony automatically tried to reach behind him but flexibility wasn't one of the armour's strong points.

“What the hell is it?”

“I am uncertain. It is proving resistant to my scans. Attempting to compensate.”

One of the robots took advantage of Tony's distraction and grabbed his helmet with the intention, Tony was sure, to pull it off taking his head along with it. Tony plunged an armoured fist into the torso of the robot, grabbed something he hoped was vital, and pulled. The light in the robot's eyes died and it crashed noisily to the ground.

Tony launched into the air again out of the robots' reach. Reopening the link to the rest of the team, he said, “Barton, I need a favour.”

“I am not playing monopoly with you again,” Clint deadpanned. “Once was enough.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “I need your eagle eyes for a sec. I think I've got a monkey on my back.”

Clint's tone grew more serious. “Swing by and I'll take a look.”

Firing a few more blasts on his way, Tony swooped up and over to where Clint was perched five stories up. He then flipped around so the archer could see his back and so he could keep an eye on the robots who were already trying to get past the perimeter he'd established.

“Shit,” said Clint which really wasn't very reassuring. 

“Well?” Tony demanded.

“Big and metal with a whole lot of wires and flashing lights. I don't know what kind of monkey that is, Stark, but you need to get it off now!”

“Fuck.” 

Taking off, Tony flew in a series of quick manoeuvres, twisting and banking in mid air, testing the armour's speed and agility to its limits as he tried to shake the thing off.

“I'm afraid it's no good, sir,” said Jarvis. “The object is attached both mechanically and magnetically to the armour. You will not be able to get it off in such a manner.”

Tony briefly considered dropping on the rooftop beside Clint to see if the archer could get it off but Clint's arrows were currently the only thing keeping the robots from breaking off into the rest of the city.

“Stark,” said Steve having been listening in. “Do you need to pull out?”

“Let me get back to you on that,” Tony said. 

He hovered high above the battle sending the occasional missile down at the rampaging robots as a hundred different scenarios played out in his mind. He really didn't like the idea of leaving in the middle of a fight especially when it meant leaving his friends behind.

“Don't take any stupid risks,” said Steve. “Bruce can be here in a few minutes.”

“I know. I know. But I think...”

“Sir!” Jarvis' voice cut him short. “My scans have penetrated the device's shielding and I am detecting a high level of explosives.”

Bomb. Jarvis hadn't said it but the word still echoed loudly in Tony's head. 

“How much explosives?”

“Enough to level everything in a four block radius.”

His heart seemed to stop in his chest as his blood ran cold.“What's the trigger mechanism? Can we...?”

Suddenly, Tony's voice was lost, his stomach in his throat as the world seemed to disappear beneath him. The repulsors had cut out. He was plummeting straight down, all control over the armour lost. The HUD was still working, all the info still there flashing red in his field of vision, but nothing was responding. 

“J... J... Jarvis!” he managed to choke out but there was no reply.

He was still trying to figure out what the hell was going on fighting back the pure, overwhelming terror, wondering if there had been something about the device Jarvis had missed, whether the device had done something to Jarvis himself, when the repulsors in his feet kicked in and he thankfully started to slow down. His relief was short lived though as the armour stopped fifteen feet from the ground and opened up. Then it was just him, vulnerable flesh and bone, plummeting towards the rumble strewn street.

His scream echoed down the block.

Some instinct kicked in enough for him to bend his legs as he hit the ground though it didn't stop the sharp jolt of pain that travelled through his knee or prevent the air from being forced from his lungs. He even managed to transfer some of the force of the landing into a forward roll, bare hands and arms scraping against the rough pavement until he finally came to a halt spreadeagled on his back.

Gasping, he lay there dazed as he watched the armour, now sans him, shooting higher and higher into the sky until it burst outward in a fiery cloud. The sound of the explosion came a moment later followed by a shock wave that broke glass and sent tremors through the ground beneath him.

Someone started shouting in Tony's ear.

“Stark! Stark!”

It was Steve.

Still stunned from the fall, Tony frowned as he looked around trying to find the source of the voice and felt like a complete idiot when he finally recalled the radio receiver in his ear.

“Tony!” Steve called again. “Did anyone...?”

“Good news and bad news, Cap,” Clint replied. “Good news is Stark wasn't in the armour when it blew. Bad news is he's now armourless, most likely injured, and surrounded by a dozen of those robots.”

Surrounded by... That didn't sound good, thought Tony. He painfully pushed himself up on to an elbow and looked around.

The robots were indeed surrounding him, their metal limbs clunking loudly as they came closer. Their glowing eyes gazed at him as if he were about to become their new favourite plaything and they were really looking forward to pulling him apart.

“Shit.” 

Tony was able to roll out of the way as one of them sent down a heavy fist but the roll sent him towards the feet of another. It reached towards him with fingers which looked as if they'd once been surgical tools. Thankfully before it could grab him, an arrow hit right where it's ear would've been and its head exploded. Tony rolled again, this time to get out of the way as the beheaded robot crashed onto the pavement.

“Stark, get out of there,” Clint called out.

“Yeah, easier said than done,” he replied breathlessly.

He managed to scramble to his feet but almost ended up back on the ground once more when a stab of pain shot through his left knee. Limping, he made it through the gap Clint's arrow had provided, the ominous sound of the robots' heavy footsteps following behind him and growing closer. Adrenaline was keeping most of the pain at bay but it felt as if his knee would buckle at any moment. 

So he was very glad when the clunk of metal against pavement was joined by a familiar swooshing sound.

He turned to see a red, white, and blue shield ricochet off several robots before imbedding itself in the one nearest him. The shield was soon followed by its owner bounding over the robots, using their heads as stepping stones until he landed with a flip in front of Tony.

“You okay?” Steve asked glancing over his shoulder as he confronted the incoming robots.

“Peachy,” Tony replied taking the opportunity to lean against a nearby abandoned car and take the weight off his injured knee. “Nice of you to join me.”

Dodging a clumsy blow, Steve retrieved his shield. “Well, I couldn't let you face these poor pathetic robots on your own.” He used the shield to body slam one of the robots sending it tumbling into another creating a domino effect throughout the army.

Tony groaned. “I'm never going to live that one down, am I?”

“I don't know,” Steve replied as he sent his shield off once more bouncing back and forth against the robot's metal heads. “You did manage to save us from getting blown up and get yourself out more or less in one piece. That was some quick thinking.”

“I suppose so,” Tony agreed quietly as the Captain charged once more into the robotic melee. 

Doing his best to keep out of the way of the fighting, Tony tapped at his earpiece. “Jarvis?” he said. “You still with me?” 

There was a tiny beep indicating the A.I. had switched them over to their own personal frequency.

“Always, sir,” Jarvis replied. 

Tony smiled. He knew Jarvis existed independent of the armour but it was still good to hear his voice again. “Memory transferred from the suit alright?”

“Yes, sir. I feel I should apologize. Immediate action was called for and there seemed insufficient time to...”

Tony shook his head. “Forget it, J.”

“But sir. I knew there was a good chance of injury resulting from my actions. My calculations indicated...”

“Save it,” Tony said watching the diminishing robot army become scrap metal once more and realizing just how close he'd come to being the one on the scrap heap. “You did good.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: some possibly mildly disturbing PTSD stuff in this chapter.

It was just a cave, a plain, ordinary cave, a path in the rock probably carved by some ancient underground river several millennia ago. It certainly wasn't The Cave. It was nothing like The Cave. It was made out of a completely different type of rock and much too damp. Moss was even growing up one side of the entrance. This wasn't the desert. This was a nice temperate climate with lots of trees. No miles of sand. No burning hot days and freezing cold nights. Nothing like Afghanistan. This was a completely different cave. 

And yet...

Tony stared at the dark entrance in the mountain side.

“Stark,” Natasha called out breaking him from his thoughts. “Are we heading in or not?”

“Huh?” said Tony turning to look at her. 

Agent Romanov raised an enquiring eyebrow at him. She was wearing her usual black, skin-tight suit and had a large assault rifle slung over her right shoulder, one of undoubtedly many weapons currently on her person.

Tony cleared his throat. “Yeah, of course,” he said.

“It sure doesn't look like we're heading in,” she said, the corner of her mouth twisting upward in a teasing smile.

Tony scowled back not that she'd be able to see it under his helmet. “I just think this is going to be a huge waste of our time.”

“According to Thor this is exactly the sort of place this creature likes to hang out.”

“According to Thor the creature we're looking for is a freaking troll, an actual, live, straight-from-a-storybook troll. We should be looking under bridges and possibly investing in some goats to use as bait.”

Natasha snorted. “And how is a troll any weirder than any of the other things we've fought recently?”

“Good point.” 

Tony gazed at the cave once more. Everything was fine, he told himself. He could do this. No problem. It would be a walk in the park, a very dark, rocky, enclosed park. 

He suppressed a shiver.

“Alright,” he said taking a deep breath. “Let's go.”

He started heading forward, armour joints creaking as he walked. The cave mouth loomed ominously ahead of him slowly growing bigger. When he was only a couple steps from the entrance, he stopped again.

“On second thoughts,” he said, “why don't we just stay here and I'll have Jarvis run a thermal imaging scan of the cave. Save us a bunch of time and effort.”

Natasha frowned. “Will Jarvis' sensors penetrate all the way through the rock? It's a pretty big cave.”

“Of course, they will,” Tony said with confident enthusiasm.

“Actually, sir,” said Jarvis speaking over the com-link so both of them could hear. “The composition of the mountain does effectively insulate against infrared emissions. Thermal imaging would be ineffective.”

“Traitor,” Tony grumbled under his breath.

Natasha adjusted the rifle hanging from her shoulder and gave him a look.

“What?” Tony demanded disliking the intense stare. He shifted uncomfortably, the armour giving another metallic creak.

“You know you could stay out here if you want,” she said. “Shouldn't take me too long to check out the cave.”

Tony crossed his armoured arms across his chest. “What exactly are you implying?”

“I'm not implying anything,” she replied shaking her head, the same inscrutable look on her face.

“Good,” Tony snapped at her. “Because you're an idiot if you think you're going in there alone. Cap would kill me if I went and let you get eaten by a damn troll.”

“Great,” said Natasha. “Then let's go.”

“Fine,” said Tony peevishly.

Together they headed into the cave.

“You know you should really patent that stare of yours. It would make a very effective lethal weapon. You could call it the Black Widow Death Glare.”

“Shut up, Stark.”

It was unsurprisingly dark in the cave, dark and rocky, and not much else. The reactor on Tony's chest illuminated the way ahead showing rough gray walls and a stone strewn floor. 

“This is cozy,” Tony said as they gazed around. 

There was no sign of the troll so they continued on going deeper into the cave. The entrance had been about as tall as an average doorway and three times as wide but inside the shape of the cave constantly changed. Sometimes the ceiling became so low they had to stoop to avoid bumping their heads. Sometimes it was big enough to fly the Qunijet through. The path the cave led them down twisted in various directions and soon the way they'd entered was hidden from view leaving not even the tiniest ray of sunlight visible.

Tony really wished he'd brought a better light source. The arc reactor left dark shadows in every corner. Natasha, of course, seemed quite at home as she strode through them. Tony was nowhere near as comfortable. 

After a few minutes treading carefully through the darkness, his foot hit something that clinked loudly as it rolled across the ground. He almost jumped out of his suit. Recovering, thankfully before Natasha noticed, he bent down to pick the object up and turned it over in the light. 

It was a beer bottle.

“Well, if the troll is here,” he said as he examined the label, “he's got a lousy taste in beer.”

Natasha just sent him one of her unpatented death glares and held a finger to her lips.

Tony opened his mouth to say something else but then thought better of it. 

They continued along passing jagged rock wall after jagged rock wall. Geology wasn't one of Tony's strong suits. If he wanted, he could have had Jarvis identify what kind of rock the walls were made of, but he had no clue. To him, all rock looked the same, and they all reminded him of...

He shook his head, tried to think of something else. Restless, he tapped his fingers against his thigh, metal clunking against metal, but stopped when Natasha glared at him again. He didn't understand why she was being such a fuss about noise. It wasn't like the Iron Man armour was that quiet in the first place. Anyone could probably hear the heavy steps he made from one end of the cave to the other. He really needed to make a stealth armour. He tried designing one in his head but found it hard to concentrate.

The cave seemed to go on forever.

He shivered.

“Hey, Jarvis,” he said, making sure both the com and the armour's speakers were off so Natasha didn't glare at him again. “Could you up the suit temperature a bit. It's getting a bit nippy in here.”

“My gauges indicate that the temperature has not changed significantly since entering the cave,” Jarvis replied.

“Well, up the temperature anyway.”

“As you wish.”

People tended to assume Afghanistan was always hot. They saw pictures of desert and thought heat wave, but it could get fucking cold there too. The Cave would become freezing at night if they didn't keep the fires going, if he and Yinsen...

He pushed the memories away again but it was harder this time. Troll, he reminded himself, remember you're supposed to be looking for a troll. He focused on his surroundings once more. The last thing he needed was to get killed by a damn fairy tale creature because he was distracted.

They came to another low part of the ceiling. Natasha ducked underneath and he followed behind her. As he did so, he suddenly felt it, the whole weight of the mountain, thousands of tons of rock bearing down on him. 

Sweat prickled against Tony's forehead. 

This was stupid. He wasn't claustrophobic. At least, he'd never been claustrophobic before.

“Detecting increased respiratory and heart rate,” said Jarvis. “Are you alright, sir?”

“I'm fine,” Tony replied breathlessly. “I'm fine. I'm fine.”

He tried to focus on Natasha ahead of him but she disappeared merging with the shadows. He took a deep breath trying to rid himself of the jittery feeling that was consuming him but it didn't help. 

Was that dust in the air? The armour was supposed to filter out pretty much everything but he was sure he could smell dust. Or was it sand? Sand and stone, and metal, and fire, and...

His heart already going at a fair pace began to race and his breathing became ragged. The world shifted around him. Gray rock walls became sandy brown. Florescent lights flickered in the corner of his eye. The sound of foreign voices drifted in from the distance. 

And then suddenly they were there grabbing him and yelling in his ear. Angry faces pushed into his. They shook him, shook him so violently he thought he could feel his brain knocking back and forth against his skull. When that didn't get them what they wanted, the bag was shoved over his head again and they began dragging him through the cave. All he could see was moving shadows and pinpoints of light as he was pulled along. Eventually, they made it to their destination and they forced him to his knees.

It was going to start up again. He knew it. The cold water stealing the air from his lungs. When would it end? Hadn't he agreed to do what they wanted already? It was hard to think, hard to breathe. 

Fingers dug painfully into his arms as they held him down. The voices grew louder screaming at him in words he couldn't understand. He could feel the fresh, raw ache in his chest, feel the solid weight of a car battery in his arms. There was a bitter taste of metal on his tongue, and he could smell... trees, cedar trees.

Slowly, he became aware of another voice speaking, a familiar voice repeating a calm litany.

“...is 63.7 degrees Fahrenheit. It is Wednesday, May 7th. You are on Mount Lago in Washington State. The current temperature is 63.7 degrees Fahrenheit. It is Wednesday...”

“Jarvis?” Tony said uncertainly.

The litany stopped. “Sir?”

“What...?”

The sun was shinning in his eyes. He blinked squinting at the brightness as it slowly sank in that he was no longer in The Cave. He was, in fact, standing on the side of a mountain. He was wearing his armour but the faceplate was up giving him an unobstructed view of cedar covered slopes and snow capped mountain peaks. He took a deep breath and smelt fresh fragrant air.

“How...?” The residue of panic was still with him and every nerve felt as if it had been fried by a few thousand volts. He swallowed and tried again. “Wasn't I just...?”

He'd been in Afghanistan, in The Cave. No, that wasn't right. He shook his head. He'd been in a cave, but a cave here, in Washington. He turned and looked behind him. There was the cave entrance and there was Natasha jogging out of it, an angry look on her face.

“I know you don't like caves,” she said as she jogged up to him, “but next time warn me when you're planning to take off.”

“Um... right,” he said still feeling somewhat disoriented.

She gazed at him with that penetrating stare once more.

“So, no troll?” he said mostly in hopes that she would stop looking at him like that.

“No, troll,” she repeated. “If there had been, it would have probably attacked the moment we stepped inside what with all the noise you were making.” For a moment, it looked like she was going to say something else but seemed to change her mind. “We should meet up with the others,” she said instead. “Maybe they had better luck.”

“Or maybe this whole troll hunt is just a big mother goose chase,” Tony replied unable to keep the somewhat manic tone from his voice. “I mean what's next? Evil leprechauns? Villainous fairies? The Loch Ness Monster? Next thing you know we'll be heading to the North Pole to rescue Santa Clause. You know he never did get me the life-sized spaceship I asked for when I was six.” He was babbling. He knew he was babbling but he couldn't seem to stop himself.

Natsaha sighed. “Shut up, Stark,” she said with something that might have actually been fondness. 

The agent wrapped an arm around his side. Letting his faceplate close once more, Tony did the same with her ensuring she was secure before firing his repulsors and soaring off into the mountains.

Making sure the com was off, Tony addressed the A.I. as they flew. “Jarvis? What exactly happened?”

“You were unresponsive, sir, and since your heartbeat and breathing had greatly increased, I thought it prudent to remove you from your current surroundings,” Jarvis replied.

“Huh,” said Tony. The dark memories lingered still but they were fading out there in the open air. “Good call.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“And Jarvis.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Let's not go into any more caves anytime soon.”

“I will do my best to remind you of that, sir.”

A grin spread across Tony's tired features. “What would I do without you, J?”

“I believe that is something best not thought about,” replied the A.I.


	6. Chapter 6

It was Wednesday morning, a beautiful, warm Wednesday in mid-June. The sun was shining brightly, a light breeze was clearing away the last of the clouds, and a giant gelatinous cyborg was causing mayhem and destruction in downtown Toronto.

Just another day in the life of the Avengers thought Steve as the Quinjet flew across Upstate New York on their way to the border. 

“Toronto?” said Tony.

The Iron Man armour flew over the countryside ahead of them, a fiery streak of red and gold against the blue sky.

“Seriously, Toronto?”

“You said that already,” replied Clint from the Quinjet's cockpit as he piloted the jet a hundred feet or so behind the streak that was Stark. “Several times in fact.”

Over the team's radio, Tony continued his rant. “I know but honestly Toronto? Who would want to invade Toronto? Did they get lost on their way to New York or something? ”

“Maybe they took a wrong turn at Albuquerque,” Clint suggested drily. 

Tony snorted. “Very funny.”

The Iron Man armour pulled ahead slightly.

“Ease up, Stark,” said Steve. He was standing behind Clint watching Tony through the cockpit windows. “We're going in together, remember?”

The Iron Man armour suddenly changed direction swooping back towards them and then proceeding to do several loops around the Quinjet.

“Ease up yourself, Old Glory,” said Stark, giving him a wave as he passed by the window. “It's not my fault you guys can't keep up with me.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “Still you'd better stay close,” he said pointedly. “We wouldn't want you to get lost.”

“One time,” Tony replied defensively. “It was only the one time. The GPS on the suit got damaged. It was not my fault.”

Steve smiled. “Of course not,” he said.

He turned to the back of the jet where the other Avengers were waiting. Thor, his hammer hanging loosely in his grip, was standing by the hanger door already ready for the coming battle. Bruce, his fingers intertwining nervously, sat at the side showing much less enthusiasm. Natasha sat next to him, her attention focused on the tablet in her hands.

“Nat, you got anything on whatever the hell this thing is?” Steve asked.

Natasha shook her head. “Nothing I've found in SHIELD's database even remotely resembles it. Nothing in any other database I've tried either.”

“Keep searching,” said Steve.

“You know Jarvis could do that,” Tony interjected over the radio.

“We need a little more than a Google search, Stark,” Clint put in. 

Tony scoffed. “Please don’t tell me you just compared Jarvis to Google.”

“Of course, not,” said Clint with an audible smirk. “Jarvis is nothing like Google. Siri, on the other hand...”

A sound of complete indignation came over the com channel.

“Don't get him started, Clint,” said Natasha. “You know how Stark feels about Apple.”

“Apple is a pretentious hipster cult,” Tony declared vehemently, “whose tech is mediocre hack jobs ripped off from those of far superior intelligence, namely me.”

“Told you,” said Natasha.

“Siri,” Tony continued, “is nothing more than a talking clock, a well trained, electronic parrot. Jarvis is a completely autonomous artificial intelligence whose brilliance almost rivals my own. In short, he is awesome. You'd be amazed at what he can do.”

“Yeah, yeah,” said Clint. “We all know how much you love your robot butler.”

“Hey...” Tony began.

Steve decided to intervene before the argument went any further. “Focus people,” he said. “We're here to fight huge gelatinous cyborgs remember not each other.”

They were travelling over Lake Ontario by then and the skyscrapers of Toronto were already visible. It didn't take them long to track down the creature once they reached the city. Street lights and traffic signs had been knocked over. Trees had been uprooted. Cars had been flattened and torn apart. Giant gashes had been taken out of various buildings littering the streets with chunks of concrete and broken glass. The Avengers just followed the trail of damage and it led them right to it.

“Holy crap,” Clint exclaimed as the Quinjet circled around trying to get a better look at what they were up against.

It was over thirty-feet tall and comprised mostly of a semi-translucent, iridescent green goo with various cables, pieces of metal, and bits of circuitry woven throughout. Lights could also be seen shining and winking inside. The thing sludged through the street like a giant slug crushing everything in its path. Every so often a bit of goo would form into a tentacle and whip out slashing through the nearby buildings almost as if it were looking for something.

“I christen it Cyber-Blob,” declared Tony.

“Cyber-Blob?” said Natasha incredulously.

“I like it,” said Clint.

“You would,” Natasha replied.

Stark swooped in closer though still keeping a cautious distance. “This thing is certainly on the ugly side of bizarre.”

“What’s it doing?” questioned Bruce as he leaned into the cock-pit and gazed through the window.

One of the creature's tentacles had wrapped around a small green car and it was picking it up. A giant maw formed in the middle of the creature and it dumped the car inside.

“Um, it’s eating a car,” said Tony as he hovered above it.

Suddenly, the creature convulsed and the car was spewed out again though now in many more pieces than it had been before.

“And it seems to have fairly picky tastes,” Tony concluded.

“Any clue as to what it’s made of?” asked Steve.

Bruce frowned rubbing the side of his face absentmindedly. “Some sort of intelligent slime. Maybe an electronically enhanced algae or bio-neural gel.”

“You have no clue do you?” said Tony.

Banner sighed. “None at all. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Me neither, but Jarvis says that all the electronic components are human-made so at least it’s not aliens again.”

“It’s certainly not of Asgard origin,” added Thor speaking up for the first time. “Or any other realm I’ve visited.”

“If I could analyze a piece of it in my lab…” Bruce began.

“I’m afraid we don’t have time,” said Steve.

Outside the Quinjet, the creature had begun tearing into another building and terrified people could be seen fleeing from it in every direction.

“We’re going to need you in the field for this one.”

Bruce nodded, though he did it unenthusiastically, and he went to put his shoes and shirt away to save them from the imminent destructive force of his transformation.

“Okay people,” Steve said going into full command mode. “We hit it hard but we hit it smart.” He slammed his hand against a large button on the wall and the back cargo doors of the plane began to hinge open bringing in a rush of wind. “Try to find any weaknesses it might have, look out for civilians, and keep property damage to a minimum.”

“Because the last thing we want is a bunch of angry Canadians after us,” Tony couldn’t help adding.

Steve ignored him. 

Bruce and Thor were already heading out the open doors. Thor, swinging his hammer, shot out accompanied by a crack of thunder. Bruce just stepped off the edge. He looked small and fragile as he did so, but by the time he hit the ground, he was large and green and left a large crater in the pavement.

“Hawkeye,” Steve continued, “you’ll be our eye up high as usual. See what the Quinjet weapon systems can do to this thing.”

“Aye, aye, Captain,” said Clint, one hand already prepping the jet's missiles for launch.

“Widow, I need you to keep trying to find out where this thing originated. We're fighting blind here.”

“Will do,” Natasha said. “But if you guys get yourself in trouble, I'm coming down to rescue you.” And then she added with a smirk, “Again.”

Smiling, Steve gave her a quick salute and then jumped out of the plane. 

On the streets of downtown Toronto, the Avengers engaged the creature now known as Cyber-Blob using the full force of their shield, fists, hammer, and repulsors. 

None of them seemed to have any effect.

They did get the creature's attention though and numerous tentacles sprung forth from its body and started trying to grab the Avengers.

“It's like fighting a giant jello salad,” said Tony as he swooped out of the way of a green tentacle. His repulsors left blackened furrows across the creature's back but they repaired themselves within seconds. 

“Whatever the hell this thing is made of it's a lot tougher than jello,” said Clint, continuing to circle overhead in the Quinjet. He sent down a pair of missiles. They hit the creature right on target and dove deep inside the goo, but instead of exploding, they stopped dead and hung inside the creature with all the other metal parts.

“Crap,” he said. “I think it just ate my missiles.”

“This beast is proving quite formidable,” Thor said. “Fortunately, so are we.” He struck his hammer against the creature, but the hammer bounced right off causing nothing more than a few ripples to travel across the thing's hide.

“My God,” said Tony as he watched it wobble. “It really is made of jello.”

Thor frowned. “I don't understand,” he said. “Mjolnir has struck down much more powerful foes.”

“I bet none of them were made of jello.” 

“Stark,” said Steve tiredly starting to reach his limit for Stark snark.

“Yes, oh extremely patriotic one,” Tony replied.

“Shut up.”

Steve threw his shield but it had as much effect as Thor's hammer. He bodily slammed the shield against the thing's side. He tried digging the edge into it. Nothing worked.

“Thor,” he called over to the Asgardian. “How about trying a bit of lightening. See if we can fry this thing's circuits.”

Thor nodded. He raised Mjolnir above his head. Dark clouds gathered in the otherwise cloudless sky and a boom of thunder was heard as lightening shot down into the hammer. Thor then aimed Mjolnir at the creature and it was struck by a white arc of light. 

The lightening sizzled and cracked. 

The iridescent green goo trembled.

And then a dozen more tentacles sprung up and began lashing out at the Avengers.

Steve dodged out of the way but one of them hit Thor knocking him through the front of a nearby sushi restaurant temporarily taking him out of the fight.

“So much for lightening,” said Steve.

“The goo is acting as a natural insulator protecting the internal electronics,” said Tony as he flew in-between the tentacles, “which is exactly what I predicted. I would've mentioned it earlier but someone told me to shut up.”

Steve let out a loud breath of frustration. “This thing must have some weakness,” he said.

The Hulk was also growing frustrated, or rather more frustrated than usual. He had gone from pummelling the creature to jumping up and down on it to hitting it with various abandoned cars and torn-out lampposts, but all he'd succeeded in doing was to make the creature wiggle and jiggle some more. He was now wrestling with several of the tentacles. He let out a loud roar as he pulled at them.

The creature was barely paying attention to the Hulk's attack and was oozing down the street once more knocking over trees, flattening cars, and snapping power lines as it went.

“Um, plan, Captain leader sir?” said Stark as he hovered over top the creature watching the carnage.

Thor emerged from the sushi restaurant looking nothing more than a bit dusty after his flight through its window. “Our normal methods of attack do not seem to working,” he said as he rejoined Steve.

“Agreed,” said Steve. “Maybe if we could find out what the hell this thing wants...”

Taking advantage of the break in attacks, the creature had sent a tentacle crashing through the glass front of a nearby store. The tentacle emerged holding a collection of cell phones and tablet computers which were tossed into the creature's gaping maw. This meal it seemed to like and the lights hidden within the goo glowed brighter.

“It mainly seems to be interested in consuming high end electronics,” Tony observed. “And destroying things.”

“Hey, look,” said Clint as the creature proceeded to eat some MacBooks. “Even gelatinous cyborgs likes Apple.”

“That proves it,” said Tony. “This thing is clearly evil.”

“Right. Because just trying to destroy the city wasn't proof enough,” Clint replied.

There were still civilians in the area much to Steve's concern. Most were being escorted out by some sort of local Swat team, but with the sheer number of people it was impossible to clear them fast enough and it was only a matter of time before one got in the creature's way and was hurt or killed. 

“Ok, team,” he said. “Let's...”

“Hey, guys,” Natasha called out over the radio. “I've got something.”

“Good,” said Stark. “Because we've got nothing.”

“What is it, Nat?” asked Steve.

“I think I've found who made this thing,” she said. 

“AIM?” suggested Tony.

“Hydra?” suggested Clint.

“The long forgotten mages of Peladon?” suggested Thor much to everyone's confusion.

“A small biotech start-up called Quantum Organics,” said Natasha. “They've been experimenting with programmable micro-organisms, kind of like biological nanobots.”

“And they're in Shield's database?” asked Steve.

“Nope,” Natasha replied. “On Kickstarter.”

“You mean we're dealing with an evil crowd-sourced gelatinous cyborg?” Clint said in astonishment.

“It's a whole new world,” said Tony.

Steve watched as the creature grew bored of the store it had been raiding and began oozing down the street once more ignoring the fact the Hulk was still trying to tear off its tentacles. It paused briefly to shred a streetcar to pieces, and then continued on its way.

“You said they were programmable micro-organisms,” said Steve. “Does that mean you can hack in and reprogram this thing?”

“If I can trace the signal they're using to control it, sure,” said Natasha. “But it might take a little while.”

“You know Jarvis could...” Tony began.

“Not now, Stark,” Steve snapped before addressing Romanoff once more. “Do it, Nat. We'll try to keep this thing busy in the meantime.”

The creature had stopped in front of another building, an office tower made of blue-tinted glass, and began attacking it. People streamed out, wide-eyed, screaming, but the creature didn't pay any attention to them. Its tentacles were busy tearing through the second floor. Glass rained down upon the street. After a bit of searching, the creature yanked out a photocopier, placed it in its mouth, and then stood there chewing almost thoughtfully on the machine.

“We can't let it continue its rampage into other parts of the city,” said Steve. “We need to slow it down somehow.”

“A wise suggestion,” said Thor, “but our weapons are useless. We are mere fleas to this creature.”

The chewed up remains of the photocopier were spat out on to the street and the creature began poking inside the third floor.

“Tony's repulsors seem to have some effect,” Clint noted. 

“Yeah, for a few seconds,” said Tony. “Then the damn thing heals itself.” Swooping low over the creature once more, he fired at it as if to demonstrate, and then dodged out of the way of a tentacle as the blackened marks he made quickly disappeared.

“Can you up the power?” Steve asked.

“Technically, yes,” said Tony. “But that would require staying in one place for more than a couple seconds and if you hadn't notice...” He evaded another grasping tentacle. “... this thing doesn't like me much.”

“Then we'll just have to keep its focus elsewhere,” said Steve.

After exchanging a quick look, Steve and Thor raced towards the creature taking up positions on either side of the it. There they joined the Hulk in pummelling the creature as best they could. The creature stopped rummaging through the office tower and began focusing on the attackers sending tentacles to swat at them. Steve and Thor evaded the tentacles and kept the onslaught going.

“That's it Cyber-Blob,” said Tony as he got into position directly over the creature. “Keep swatting at those pesky fleas. Don't pay any attention to the nice shiny Iron Man hovering right above you.”

He opened fire with both palm repulsors and the reactor in his chest. The brilliant blue rays shot down at the creature and a large hole began to appear as the goo was burned away. 

The creature writhed and withered.

“Hey, it's actually working,” said Tony. “At this rate we won't need Romanoff's subpar hacking skills after all. I just need to...”

Out of nowhere a new tentacle formed. It shot upward and wrapped around Tony's legs.

“Oh, shit,” was all Tony managed to say before he was swung violently through the air.

The creature was clearly pissed off. Keeping a tight hold on the Iron Man armour, it swung Tony into a nearby high-rise sweeping him through glass and concrete and metal. Then it did it again. After that, it slammed him against the pavement, multiple times with a horrendous crash of metal against stone.

“Tony!” Steve yelled desperately looking for a way to intervene.

Fortunately, or perhaps not, the creature seemed to tire of flinging Tony around. Instead, it held him up, in his now badly scraped and dented armour, and let him dangle upside down above it. 

And then it opened its mouth.

“Shit!” Clint exclaimed. “It wants high end electronics? We've just handed it a five-star dessert. The fucking thing's going to eat him!”

“Nat...” said Steve as he watched Stark hang limply in the creature's grip.

“I'm working on it,” Natasha replied, her voice tense. “I'm working on it.”

Steve threw his shield at the tentacle even though he knew it would be useless. The shield bounced off. The tentacle didn't so much as flinch.

Thor spun his hammer and flew towards Tony only to be swatted out of the sky before he could reach him.

“Hulk!” Steve called out. The Hulk didn't often take orders but it couldn't hurt to try. “Iron Man needs an assist.”

The Hulk didn't even look up, all his anger focused on the tentacles that refused to yield to his fists.

The creature began lowering Tony towards its mouth.

“Stark, you've got to do something,” Steve cried. “Tony, can you hear me?”

Tony didn't reply but just as it seemed he was about to be swallowed, the repulsors in his palms suddenly began to glow and fired right into the creature's mouth.

The creature really didn't like that. 

Tony was let go, tossed aside as the creature's whole body convulsed. He flew through the air some ways down the block. Steve didn't see where he ended up.

“Stark,” he called as he backed away from the writhing creature.

There was no response.

The creature seemed to be going ballistic. Tentacles shot out in every direction striking out randomly. Giant chunks were torn from the buildings on either side of the street and came tumbling down towards them. 

“Nat,” Steve called out again.

“I said I'm working on it,” she replied. “I'm in the system but I still need to find a way to shut this damn thing down.”

A gust of wind blew past as Thor rejoined him, the Asgardian's normally magnificent hair was a tangled mess but otherwise he seemed unharmed.

“Any sign of Stark?” Steve asked.

Thor shook his head, his face tight with the same concern as Steve's.

“All we seem to have accomplished is to rile the beast's temper,” Thor said.

“At least, it's...” Steve began.

“On your right!” Clint yelled from the Quinjet.

They glanced to the right, and then immediately dove out of the way as the front of the building beside them came crashing down.

Unfortunately, Steve's dive took him right into the reach of the creature's tentacles. One of them wrapped around his neck and began to squeeze.

Thor was immediately at his side, his strong hands around the tentacle as he tried to loosen its grip on Steve's throat, but the thing refused to budge.

“Hulk!” Thor cried as he struggled. “Where is that blasted brute?” 

They heard the Hulk roar but he didn't appear, apparently occupied on the opposite side of the creature.

Even as he struggled to breathe, Steve tried to help Thor hoping their combined strength would be able to get the tentacle off him but it still wouldn't budge.

“What's going on down there?” demanded Clint.

“The Captain is in need of aid,” said Thor. “I can not remove him from the creature's clutches. Stark? Stark, if you can hear me...”

Steve's strength started to fade. His arms fell loosely at his side and darkness began creeping in around the edges of his vision. The world grew shallow and distant.

Suddenly, the sound of repulsors was heard and a bright blue light struck the tentacle severing it from the main body.

Steve took a giant gulp of air as Thor quickly removed the now limp tentacle from his neck and pulled him out of range of the creature's tentacles. Bent over gasping, Steve took a moment to just breathe waiting until he no longer felt like he was about to pass out before he gazed up at his rescuer. 

Stark hovered in the air a dozen feet above them.

“Nice of you to finally join us,” Steve said breathlessly.

There was a pause as he waited for the inevitable sarcastic retort but none came.

Straightening up, Steve frowned. “You know you could have let us know you were still alive.”

Tony still didn't say anything.

“Stark...”

Clint interrupted. “Hey, Cap. That brick building on the North side of the street is looking pretty unstable. It also happens to be completely clear of bio signs.”

Steve gazed over at the building, a six story building made of red brick with old fashioned rounded windows. It definitely looked unstable. A lot of the front of the building had been torn away and it was starting to lean precariously. It was also right beside where the creature was going berserk. 

“I see it, Clint,” he said. “Good call.” He addressed the others. “Avengers, you know what I said about minimizing property damage? Forget it. We're bringing the house down on this thing. Stark, Thor, see if you can push that building over onto our little Cyber-Blob.”

Thor gazed over at the building. “It's not only this beast the building shall fall upon,” he pointed out.

The Hulk had climbed on top of the creature by this time as he continued trying unsuccessfully to pull it apart.

“Don't worry about it,” said Clint. “The Hulk can take it and it's not like he doesn't already hate you.”

An amused smile spread across Thor's features. “That may be but I shall not be the only one once I inform him of whose idea this was.”

“You wouldn't,” Clint protested. “Thor?”

Thor didn't reply but he continued to grin as he swung his hammer and flew off towards the building.

“Stark, please tell me he was joking,” said Clint.

Stark didn't reply either.

“Stark?” Clint sighed. “Great. Guess I'm on my own. Remind me to stay out of the Hulk's way in future.”

Stark followed Thor, still oddly silent. There was something off with his flying too. It lacked its usual flare and grace. Probably due to damage to the armour, Steve reasoned and he shoved aside the uneasy feeling that was beginning to grow in his gut.

As Thor and Tony flew around behind the brick building, Steve ran down the street getting himself to a safe distance. Once he was out of range, he turned and watched and waited.

The creature was oblivious, currently occupied with it continued wrestling match with the Hulk who was now tackling at least a dozen tentacles at once.

There was a loud creak, the sound of metal and concrete under too much strain. Large cracks started to appear on the building's already damaged facade and several bricks tumbled down into the street. Slowly, the entire structure began to tilt forward. The last of its unbroken windows cracked and more bricks fell. Finally, it reached the angle of no return, and then the whole thing came crashing down landing right on top of the creature, and consequently the Hulk, with a loud echoing boom.

A giant cloud of dust was blown up by the crash. Steve ducked down and raised his shield as it swept over him. When the worst had passed, he lowered the shield once more and gazed over to where the creature had once been. 

The Cybe-Blob was gone. Instead in the middle of the street there was a large hill of brick, metal, and glass.

Steve stared unblinkingly at the hill as the echoes of the crash faded in the distance. He stood there and waited.

The dust began to settle.

The world grew quiet and still.

And then suddenly the debris was thrown aside as green tentacles burst from hill. The Hulk emerged too roaring with rage. The tentacles thrashed about dislodging even more debris and the hill bulged outward as more and more of the creature emerged.

Steve readied his shield. “Avengers...” he began, but before he could say anything more, the creature suddenly stopped, every tentacle frozen; then the whole thing slowly began to dissolve, simply melting away. It wasn't long before all that was left of the creature was a giant pile of green goo and various bits of machinery.

Steve stared in astonishment.

“I got it,” said Nat through his earpiece.

“Yeah, we can see that,” said Clint.

For a moment, there was a look of almost comical confusion on the Hulk's face as if he couldn't understand where his wrestling companion had gone, and then he roared and began jumping up and down on the leftover bits of machinery apparently upset that he hadn't been the one to destroy the creature.

Steve decided to let him vent a bit before they tried bringing him in.

“Good job, guys,” he said. “Let's gather up.”

The Quinjet set down a short distance away, Clint manoeuvring it into a perfect landing despite the wreckage strewn across the street. Thor came down nearby, his red cape fluttering behind him, a satisfied grin on his face. Stark came down a moment later. His repulsors cut off as he hit the pavement a dozen feet from Steve, and then he just stood there silent and unmoving.

Steve frowned realizing he hadn't heard a word from Stark since the creature had grabbed him. 

“Stark?” he said.

There was no reply, no quip or sarcastic comment, no complaint or demand for food. Stark just stood there in his battered armour like a store front mannequin. As annoying as Tony's near constant commentary could be, Steve found the sudden silence from the normally talkative engineer unnerving. 

“Is our friend Stark not speaking to us?” asked Thor who had apparently noticed the same thing.

“He's probably just sulking because he didn't get to be the one to do the awesome hacking job,” said Clint as he exited the back of the Quinjet with Natasha.

It was possible Stark was in one of his moods, that he was sulking or acting up. Steve really wanted to believe that, to get angry at Tony Stark for acting like Tony Stark, but the uneasiness that had settled in his gut was still there and it was growing stronger. 

He strode up to Tony. “Stark, you better be about to tell me your transmitter’s busted because...”

The voice that emerged from the armour's speakers was not the one he expected.

“Captain Rogers.”

Steve stopped in surprise. “Jarvis?” The A.I. seldom addressed him especially out in the field. Jarvis didn't talk to anyone much other than Tony.

“Captain, I must inform you that Mr. Stark requires immediate medical attention,” Jarvis said, an edge of concern in the A.I.'s normally passive voice.

“What?” Steve exclaimed.

The others rushed over to join him surrounding the still motionless armour. 

“Mr. Stark is suffering from a severe concussion and may have other injuries I am unable to detect,” Jarvis continued.

The Avengers exchanged confused looks.

“A concussion?” said Natasha. “Wait. Are you saying he's unconscious?”

“That is correct, Agent Romanoff.”

Clint frowned. “What...? But how...?”

The faceplate of the Iron Man armour popped open. 

Steve took in a sharp breath while the others stepped back in surprise.

There's something rather disturbing about seeing an unconscious person standing upright, because there was no doubt in Steve's mind that Tony would have been flat on the ground if it hadn't been for the armour. Tony's eyes were closed, his complexion pale and gray. Dried blood caked the left side of his face.

Steve immediately started giving out orders. “Nat, reign in the Hulk. We may need Dr. Banner's expertise. Clint, fetch the stretcher and the first aid kit from the Quinjet.” 

Both agents nodded and ran off in opposite directions.

Steve took a step forward and then hesitated when he realized he didn't know how to proceed. He lightly tapped Stark's face and called his name but there was no response. The Iron Man armour that encased him was covered in scratches and dents. Steve had no idea how to get Tony out of it and couldn't even take the man's pulse with it on.

“Jarvis,” he said uncertainly. “Can you open the armour?”

With the whine of tiny motors and creak of metal joints, the armour began opening up, splitting apart piece by piece until Stark's unconscious body tumbled out of it. Steve quickly stuck out his arms catching Tony before he could land face first on the pavement. With Thor's help, he carefully turned Tony over and they gently laid him on the ground. Yanking off a glove, Steve put two fingers to Tony's neck and was relieved to feel a strong, steady pulse.

“Mr. Stark's heart rate is currently 67 beats per minute,” Jarvis provided helpfully.

“Um, thanks, Jarvis,” said Steve glancing back at the armour.

The Iron Man armour had closed up again and it stood there like a sentinel watching over them. 

“All his vitals are currently stable,” Jarvis elaborated, “though slightly below normal.”

Steve nodded and turned back to Stark. While Thor stood by watching anxiously, Steve gave Tony a quick once over but other than the wound on his head there didn't seem to be any other obvious injuries though after what he'd been through Steve was sure the engineer would be covered in bruises by tomorrow. The head wound, a two inch gash across his left temple, looked pretty nasty.

“Always finding trouble, aren't you Tony,” said Steve.

“He does have a penchant for it,” Jarvis observed. “It has proven remarkably difficult to keep him out of it.”

Steve's head swung back round and he stared at the armour. There was a flicker of insight, a half formed understanding starting to grow in the back of his mind, but he was distracted by the clatter of metal as Clint returned pushing the stretcher before him, the first aid kit perched on top.

Steve and Thor lifted Tony up and set him down on the stretcher. As they did so, Tony stirred slightly and let out a low groan. 

“Our friend awakens,” declared Thor.

Steve placed a hand on Stark's shoulder. “Tony?”

There was another groan and Tony's head shifted to the side, but his eyes remained closed.

“Come on, Stark,” said Steve gently shaking Tony's shoulder. “You going to laze about playing dead all the way home. Clint will eat all your post-battle Shawarma if you do.”

“Please,” said Clint. “Like I'm the one with the biggest appetite on this team. I'll just draw dicks all over his face until he wakes up.”

Tony's eyelids opened a tiny crack and he blearily looked at them for a second before shutting his eyes once more and giving yet another groan.

“God,” he mumbled. “What a sight to wake up to.”

The others just grinned, a large amount of the tension dropping away.

“Hey, what do you know,” said Steve. “He's still alive.”

“Not by choice,” Tony replied. “A headache like this should only come after copious amounts of expensive alcohol.” He squinted up at them. “Please tell me we got that giant jello monster.”

“Fear not,” said Thor. “The beast has been well and truly vanquished. His melted remains rest upon the ruins he created.”

Tony made a face. “I'm never eating jello ever again.”

Natasha ran up then, Bruce in his torn pants following behind her.

“Hey,” Bruce said as he leaned over Tony. “Looks like you took a few hits.”

Tony gazed grumpily at him. “I got my ass kicked by jello.”

With gentle fingers, Bruce carefully examined the cut on Tony's head. “Looks like you'll need a few stitches but at least it's stopped bleeding.” He grabbed the penlight from the first aid kit and switched it on, but when he attempted to check Tony's pupils, Tony scrunched his eyes shut and twisted his head out of the way.

“No flashy light thing,” he said.

Bruce sighed. “You know the drill. Would you rather know if you have bleeding in your brain now or after it kills you?”

“Fucking smartass doctor,” Tony grumbled, but he let Bruce check his pupils wincing as he did so.

“I've got a nice strobe light around here somewhere,” Clint teased. “Would that help?”

Tony scowled. “You try anything like that Tweety Bird and I'll make sure to vomit all over you.”

“His pupils look good but he should probably have a CT done of his head when we get back. Make sure everything's normal,” said Bruce.

Natasha snorted. “Like he's ever been normal.”

“Ha, ha,” Tony said weakly.

“How long was he unconscious?” Bruce asked.

Steve frowned and gave a slight sideways glance at the silent armour standing like a statue behind them. “I'm not entirely sure.” He turned to Tony. “What's the last thing you remember?”

“Um... Cyber-Blob using me to pummel some buildings,” Tony replied.

Clint shook his head. “That can't be right. You were flying about a long time after that.”

“The head injury's probably effecting his memory. That's perfectly normal,” Bruce reassured them.

“Jarvis will know,” said Tony, and he raised his voice to address the A.I. “Hey, Jarvis buddy. How long was I out?”

“Approximately 7 minutes and 22 seconds, sir,” came Jarvis' voice from the armour making those who'd forgotten its presence jump.

The Avengers stared at each other.

“But that would mean he was unconscious for nearly half the battle,” said Natasha.

“I do not understand,” said Thor. “If Stark was unconscious...”

“Who the hell was flying the armour?” Clint finished for him.

Steve turned to gaze at the armour once more. “Jarvis...”

“Yes, Captain?”

Bruce caught the look on Steve's face and his eyes widened. “You're not suggesting...” He gestured to the armour.

“That's exactly what I'm suggesting,” said Steve. He crossed his arms across his chest. “Jarvis, what happened when Stark lost consciousness?”

“When Mr. Stark became unresponsive, my emergency protocols were activated,” Jarvis explained matter-of-factly. 

“Right,” said Steve. “And these emergency protocols entailed you to do what?”

There was a pause in which Tony coughed slightly as if embarrassed but Steve caught the amused twinkle in his eyes. He had no doubt that Tony knew exactly what had happened. 

Finally, Jarvis said, “It was necessary for me to take control of the Iron Man armour in order to ensure the safety and well-being of Mr. Stark as well as the rest of the Avengers.”

“But...” Clint stuttered gazing wide-eyed at the armour. “But...”

“What?” said Tony smiling unapologetically as he looked at their stunned faces. “It's not like he hasn't done it before.”

“You seriously let your computer take complete control of your armour?” Natasha said in astonishment.

Tony shrugged as well as he could while lying on the stretcher. “He's my co-pilot, my back-up. What did you expect?”

“I see,” said Thor seeming much less phased than the others. “Then I am glad to have him on our side. He has proven himself quite formidable in battle.”

“Thank you, Prince Odinson,” said Jarvis

“But...” Clint continued still in shock. “But...”

“Actually, this does explain a few things,” said Bruce thoughtfully.

Steve sighed. “Alright,” he said. “Ignoring the fact Stark forgot to inform us of some undeniably crucial information.” He glared at Tony as he said this. “Jarvis can obviously take control of the Iron Man armour without it being a detriment to the team. Agreed?”

The Avengers nodded though some more reluctantly than others.

“But next time,” Steve continued addressing Jarvis once more, “I'd like to know the exact moment one of my teammates loses consciousness and not when the fight is over.”

“My apologies, Captain,” said Jarvis. “Mr. Stark's vital signs were stable at the time and I believed other issues took precedence. In future, I shall inform you when Mr. Stark's lack of consciousness requires me to take control.”

“Good,” said Steve and he suddenly had a strange feeling that a new member had just been added to his team. He pointed a finger at the still grinning Stark. “Once you've recovered, you and I will be having a long, long talk.”

Tony rolled his eyes and then placed a hand to his head and winced.

Steve shook his head in exasperation.

“Wait,” said Clint seemingly regaining his sanity. “So you're saying it was Jarvis who saved Tony from being eaten?”

“Yup,” Tony replied smugly.

“And it was Jarvis who rescued Cap?”

“Yup.”

“And it was Jarvis who knocked over that building?”

Tony just grinned. “I told you Jarvis was awesome.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since this is a 5+1 fic, this should technically be the last chapter, but there is going to be a short epilogue so stay tuned.


	7. Epilogue

The world spun as Tony tumbled through the air. There was an impact. Air was forced from his lungs. Another impact. Metal screeched. Things bent, cracked, and broke. A final impact and he rolled across the ground, armour scraping against the tarmac, until he finally came to a halt lying on his back staring up at a cloud-scattered sky.

“Ow,” he said once he'd regained enough air to speak.

The blue holograms of his heads-up display stuttered and blurred before stabilizing once more now with several warnings blazing in red.

“Systems rebooting,” Jarvis declared. “Attempting to compensate for damage.” 

A moment later, some of the HUD indicators switched back to blue though many remained bright red and disturbingly low numbers showed on the suit diagnostic. 

“Perhaps the direct approach was not the best choice under the circumstances,” Jarvis observed.

“You noticed that, did you,” Tony croaked in reply. He swallowed closing his eyes for a moment. His body might have stopped moving but the world around him still seemed to be spinning.

“Alright, Stark?” Steve called out over the radio. “Tony?” he added with slightly more concern when Tony didn't answer straight away.

“Fine,” Tony replied, still breathy and hoarse, and then realizing just how bad he sounded, he cleared his throat and said, “All good, Cap.”

“Sir, I would advise informing him...” Jarvis began.

“Not now, J.”

Not privy to Tony and the A.I.'s private conversation, Steve said, “Does that mean you're planning on rejoining us sometime soon?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Tony replied. “Hold your... whatevers,” he said unable to call up his usual snarky wit. A throbbing ache in the back of his skull was making it hard to think.

“Sir, moving would not be advisable at the moment,” said Jarvis.

“Yeah, well,” said Tony. “Not much choice if I want to get back in on the action.”

The armour responded sluggishly but he was able to roll onto his side and get his arms underneath him. He began pushing himself up.

Pain. Red hot pain spreading out from his right side. Tony stifled a gasp as breathing suddenly became a very unpleasant task. The HUD blurred again, or maybe it was his vision blurring. Nausea swept down the back of his throat.

“Okay, not good,” Tony ground out between gritted teeth. 

He glanced down and saw a big dent on the right side of the armour. 

“What the hell hit me?” he muttered.

“I believe it was a Boeing 787,” said Jarvis.

Looking up, Tony saw several parked planes nearby sporting a considerable amount of damage. “Oh, right.”

Moving more gingerly, he managed to push himself the rest of the way up. He sat there trying to take shallow breaths as he waited for the pain to die back down. From the other side of the airport came the sounds of the ongoing battle. The other Avengers were bantering back and forth over the radio. He needed to get back to them. 

He began the arduous process of standing up. It seemed impossible to find a way of moving that didn't send another stab of pain through his side. Managing to get onto his hands and knees, he carefully pushed his weight back onto his feet.

“Sir, would you like me to...” said Jarvis.

“I got it,” said Tony even as he wavered and almost ended up on the ground once more.

“You taking a nap out there, Stark?” asked Steve.

“Just seeing...” Tony took in a quick breath as he finally managed to stand upright. “...how well you do without me.” 

The world started spinning again. Tony tilted sideways and only just managed to catch himself before he fell back down. Straightening back up, he congratulated himself on keeping his feet under him as well as keeping the pain out of his voice.

“Tony...” Steve said, his concern audible.

Maybe he hadn't been that successful on the second one.

“I'm fine,” Tony said. Battered armour creaking, he took a step forward and stumbled slightly. “I'll be right with you.” 

Apparently, he needed to work on being more convincing as Steve suddenly changed tactics.

“Jarvis, status on Stark.”

Before Tony could voice an objection, the A.I. replied. “EKG readings are normal however the EEG indicates Mr. Stark is suffering from a minor concussion. He also has three broken ribs and a sprained wrist.”

“I don't have a sprained wrist,” Tony protested rotating his wrists to prove the point. A flash of pain came from the left one. He hissed. “Ok, maybe I do.”

Steve's sigh could be heard even over the radio. “Stark, you're out of the fight.”

“What? No!” He began staggering in the direction of the battle or at least the direction he hoped the battle was in. “I'm not leaving you guys to face this... this... Do we even know who this guy is yet?”

Their current enemy was some big, powerful, alien guy with a cape and long hair, not Thor, a completely different big, powerful, alien guy with a cape and long hair. He had bright red skin and a large sword, and seemed intent on destroying Cairo's International Airport. Not that Tony entirely blamed him. There was a reason he used private jets.

“He said his name is Molgath the Destroyer whatever that means,” said Steve. “I've called a code green. The Hulk can handle this guy.”

“But...”

“We don't mess with broken ribs. Besides if you're in that state, how's your armour holding up?”

The noise of the battle was growing louder. Tony could see the others in the distance now. The Hulk was a brawling ball of green and Thor's lightening was flashing against the sky. Tony continued staggering towards them gritting his teeth against the pain still emanating from both his head and side.

“The armour's fine,” he insisted. 

“The integrity of the armour has been compromised in numerous locations,” Jarvis stated. “Overall power levels are currently at 27 percent. Flight power is at 39 percent. Weapon systems at 8 percent.”

Tony scowled. “Remind me whose A.I. are you again?”

“Tony,” said Steve sounding somewhat breathless. Tony could see him up ahead struggling with the Destroyer guy, blue tangling with red. “We don't have time to argue about this. Go back to HQ or wait in the Quinjet.”

Maybe it was the concussion or maybe it was the fact Tony really didn't like leaving his friends in the middle of a fight, but he decided to ignore the voice in the back of his head telling him just how much of an idiot he was being, and said, “Make me.”

There was a pause and then Steve calmly said, “Jarvis, take Stark home.”

“Yes, Captain,” Jarvis replied.

“Hey!” Tony cried as his limbs were suddenly locked into position and the armour's flight mode was activated. “Wait! You can't...” But he was already shooting up into the sky and away from the airport.

“See you back at the tower,” said Steve, the amusement clear in his voice.

“Jarvis,” Tony growled, and then he swallowed convulsively because the sudden change in altitude was really not helping with the concussion. “Take us back!”

“I'm afraid I can't do that, sir.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Now is not the time to act all Hal 9000 on me.”

“Captain Rogers has ordered me to return you to the tower,” said Jarvis matter-of-factly as they soared high above Cairo.

“Since when do you take orders from Captain Fancy Pants,” Tony demanded.

“You did specify that I should aid the Avengers in all things.”

“Not when it disagrees with your primary protocols.”

“The primary protocol that dictates I do everything in my power to look after your well being?”

“The one that says you must obey me at all times!”

“I'm sorry, sir. There seems to be a slight contradiction in my subroutines which I can not resolve at the moment. Perhaps you can amend things when we return to the tower.”

“Jarvis...”

“In the meantime, here is some in-flight music.”

A soprano voice warbled over the armour's interior speakers. 

_Un bel dì, vedremo..._

“What the hell?” Tony exclaimed. “You know I hate opera.”

_...levarsi un fil di fumo..._

“Dr. Banner seems to find this music quite relaxing.”

_...sull'estremo confin del mare._

“Jarvis!”

_E poi la nave appare._

“I recommend you get some rest, sir.”

_Poi la nave bianca entra nel porto..._

“When we get back...” Tony threatened.

The music grew louder.

_...romba il suo saluto._

Heading for New York, the Iron Man armour continued to fly over Egypt, Tony's cries of protest mingling with the strains of Madame Butterfly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for all the lovely comments and kudos! Some people would like more and I am interested in writing some sort of sequel involving the other Avengers interacting with Jarvis, but there are some more demanding plot bunnies I have to deal with first.


End file.
